


Sasanqua

by sassycatpants



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Reincarnation, Timeline Shenanigans, the relationships are Real just kinda vague bc of writing style
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-26 21:10:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12067053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassycatpants/pseuds/sassycatpants
Summary: They chase each other through the ages. Sometimes they remember who they were.Mostly, they don't.





	Sasanqua

**Author's Note:**

> Just noting because otherwise the order of lives lived may not make sense: time is not a straight line, it curls back in on itself and throws itself out in random directions, and lives are not always lived in order.
> 
> Sometimes, you experience the future before you live in the past. And sometimes, you live double lives.

_“If you do this -- if you strike this blow, you bind us to an eternal cycle we can never break!”_

_“Perhaps.” ( **But it would be an eternity with you** , the spark whispers, though the other can not hear it.  **And if the only way to keep you with me forever is to bind us in red strings, then I will bind us as tightly as I can.** )_

* * *

What she remembers is this: he writes poems on her armor, inkless glyphs traced out by gentle claw tips with barely any space between them and punctuated by kisses and quiet smiles. He promises her the world and all the stars and the sun and she believes him when he says  _i will love you until the stars go out_ because she has touched the very core of him and the truth of his promises are written there in blinding light. He gives her string and she dyes it red, tying it around their wrists with laughter and a promise to be together forever.

What she remembers is this: betrayal and the taste of ashes on her glossa as the world burns around her. He's writing poems on her armor again, but this time his claws are not gentle and energon bleeds sluggishly between the lines. Death is not a mercy, and it is not kind.

What she remembers is this: She dies, and war comes.

* * *

They are one and the same but split in two, brothers in arms and brothers of the same spark in the blackness of space traveling the void between the stars. (There is love here, encompassing and overflowing; it passes back and forth between them until they no longer remember whose love is coming from where and it doesn't matter who loved first because they have always loved each other.) Two faces and  _good_ or  _bad_ means nothing when the lines of morality are grey.

_Death ends in life begins in death ends in life ends in death b e g i n s \--_

The universe skips like a scratched record and they splinter across lines that were never meant to be drawn; they turn on each other without warning, discordant sparks shrieking melodies like broken metal.

_"This cycle will never end."_

_"Then we'll be together for eternity."_

They die, and reality warps.

* * *

They are on the cusp of something they can't define, teetering precariously and for a moment there is almost an understanding, if only they could lean just a little further over the cliff they balance on --

(but the moment shatters into crystal fragments that scatter before they can touch it and all is lost. One chosen by Primus because he is there and the true chosen is not yet ready and one lost so long ago that even though he was found, it is too late to stop the drums of war.)

_Red red red red red red **r e d**_ beats between them, whispers between sparkbeats that never quite synchronized and violence stirs in their veins, directed at each other the way a love never realized ( _remembered_ ) once was, frayed strings they can no longer see still wrapped around their wrists.

(And yet, somehow despite the violence _here_ and now, now and _there_  also exists and  _there_ they love fiercely. Glitch is witty and clever and Skids doesn't care that they've taken his hands and face. Glitch is his and he will keep him for as long as Glitch will have him, a promise meant to last forever --

it doesn't, one more _until the stars go out_  sacrificed upon the altar that is their eternity.)

Everything burns, a funeral pyre of hatred scorching the planet from the inside out; when the flames finally flicker and fade, it is with the taste of ash and betrayal on his glossa once more that he sends the other away.

(the world burnt once before, the taste of betrayal and ashes coating her glossa as it now coats his, even if he does not remember;  _cycles_ , whispers the planet under his feet.  _circles and strings dyed red around our wrists, we will never escape them._ )

* * *

_How could you do this?_ Solarflare demands. _To me, to **us**?_

_Because I loved you_ , Silvershard replies, energon bubbling between broken lips.  _I loved you and I could not bear to be apart. I would do it again, for you-me-us. It is you. A thousand times, a thousand lives and it has **always** been you._

_Always been **us**._

Solarflare turns her helm, optics staring unseeing at their clasped hands.

( _She is tying a dyed string around their wrists, he is painting poems on her armor they are one spark in two bodies traveling the eternity between stars he is false-Prime and they are burning the world to ash he is Skids and his lost almost-conjunx has broken his spark so thoroughly that he's given up, she is Solarflare and Silvershard's bloody coup has failed she is BackburnSilverglowSpinnerSparkplugathousandothernames and she is dying dying dying. A thousand lives, a thousand names._

_They have lived this tale over and over, orbiting each other like stars. Once, she would have wanted to live forever with him-her-them but that was lifetimes ago._

_Now she just wants the cycle to end._ )

_I'm tired_ , Solarflare says finally, feeling her spark flicker and fade like so many times before.  _Can't we stop now?_

The universe flickers, another record scratch.

* * *

They are one and the same but split in two, brothers in arms and brothers of the same spark in the blackness of space traveling the void between the stars. (There is hatred here, encompassing and overflowing; it passes back and forth between them until they no longer remember whose hate is coming from where and it doesn't matter who hated first because they have always hated each other.)  _Good_ and  _bad_ are black and white, drawn in sharp relief.

_Death ends in life begins in death ends in life ends in death b e g i n s --_

The universe skips like a scratched record and lines once drawn blur until they can't be seen; melodies like broken metal change in pitch until a harmony is finally achieved.

_"It is time for us to part."_

_"Then we'll part for eternity."_

They die, and reality warps.

( _The cycle breaks, and they ride the ripples in opposite directions. They will not meet again._ )


End file.
